Sunday, October 20, 2013

Caught in the act of peeing myself

I'm a lean, mean fat-burning machine.
(Anyone catch the Candid Camera reference in the headline? That's the only reason for it, really.) 

Five years ago, when we remodeled the master bath, we chose not to put a door on the water closet/shower area. Rarely has this caused a problem....until this morning.
Hubs (walking in on me in an awkward position): What are you DOING?
Me: Peeing on a stick. Do you mind?
Hubs (quickly evacuating the area): Um...you haven't had a period in eight years and...wait a minute...didn't I have a vasectomy in '88?
Me: You did. Remember the bag of frozen peas?
Hubs: So, what gives?
Me: I'm checking my ketones. It's Day 6 of Atkins induction.  They should be pretty high. It's called Benign Dietary Ketosis.
Hubs: Isn't that dangerous?
Me: Not as dangerous as being pregnant. I'll be fine.
Hubs:  OK. But, you scared the hell out of me.
Me:  You'll be fine, too.
Hubs: Yeah. Maybe a bathroom door isn't such a bad idea, after all.

2 comments:

A Fan said...

Welcome back,BG! Ditto on the BNB. Went on a news "blackout" also. Wanted to open the window ala "Network" & Peter Finch and do the famous "mad as hell" scream. Yes, got the Candid Camera ref. Remember the young Fanny Flagg?
O.k. no door on the WC of your master bath? Sorry - No can do. After 26 years, we're still "pee shy". lol

Cathy Hamilton said...

Thanks, AF. I adored Fanny. Watched CC religiously.

There's no door but the toilet is tucked away in a little nook behind the side of the shower built-in. There's usually enough privacy. Or, maybe that's the difference between 34 years and 26!

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